Gifting Vibrators This Christmas ─ Why & How

While you might not typically stumble upon a vibrator or any sex-related item in a conventional holiday gift guide, and there’s a valid reason for that, it’s essential to recognize that such gifts aren’t universally suitable. Selecting a vibrator as a present demands more consideration than picking out a phone case or gifting a Netflix subscription.

However, for those who are thoughtful and in tune with their recipient’s preferences, a vibrator could potentially make for an ideal and intimate Christmas gift this holiday season.

Why Consider Gifting a Vibrator?

Over the years, vibrators have transitioned from being cheeky presents at Bachelorette parties to something mothers pass down to their daughters. They’ve become topics of earnest conversation among friends and even recommendations from gynecologists to their patients. The once unconventional notion of gifting a vibrator is now gradually gaining acceptance as a thoughtful and unique gift for those close to us.

In fact, both men and women are increasingly at ease with the idea of receiving a sex toy as a gift from a friend. Surprisingly, statistics show that 65% of young women have received their first vibrator as a gift from a friend.

This growing comfort is accompanied by a rising awareness of the many advantages a vibrator offers to women, their partners, and their overall autonomy in pursuing pleasure. Gifting a vibrator is more than just providing a tool for self-pleasure; it’s about encouraging the recipient to prioritize self-care, self-exploration, and their own well-being.

Help her take a hesitant step


When you choose to gift a vibrator, you’re extending a helping hand to someone who might be hesitant to acquire one themselves.

Even those among us who engage in open discussions about sexuality might still find that first step into a sex toy shop or online store a bit daunting or awkward, despite their curiosity. The act of gifting a vibrator eliminates that initial hurdle and could serve as a catalyst, inspiring the recipient to further explore the world of sex toys independently. By doing so, you set an example of ease in this process.

Another reason someone might be reluctant to purchase their own vibrator is the cost. High-quality vibrators often come with price tags exceeding $100, which may deter them from investing their own money. There might be a sense of discomfort or societal conditioning associated with spending a significant sum on an item traditionally linked to hyper-sexualized contexts.

It’s important to emphasize that sex and sexual pleasure are entirely normal, carrying no less significance in our lives than any other form of leisure or entertainment. By making this purchase for someone, you’re contributing to a meaningful and deserving aspect of their well-being—a choice that recognizes our right to indulge in something we don’t necessarily need but wholeheartedly deserve.

Give it to your partner for mutual benefit

For many men and women, receiving a sex toy as a gift from their partner feels the most natural and comfortable. This comfort likely arises from the fact that you’ve likely engaged in conversations about intimacy and shared your sexual desires with your partner, making the introduction of sex toys a seamless extension of your relationship.

While the primary focus should always be on your partner’s pleasure and desires when gifting a vibrator, there’s a world of exciting exploration to undertake together. Whether it involves incorporating a discreet vibrator during penetrative sex, using it as a tantalizing addition to foreplay, or even witnessing your partner’s solo enjoyment, the opportunities are endless for couples to delight in the experience.

Even if your partner chooses to use the vibrator for self-pleasure, it can aid them in discovering their preferences and subsequently sharing this newfound knowledge with you. In fact, research from Indiana University reveals that the vast majority of men do not feel threatened by the presence of vibrators, and women might even find their partners more appealing for having gifted one.

It’s important to remember that gifting a vibrator doesn’t equate to your partner suddenly forsaking intimacy with you. Vibrators are fantastic, but they lack the qualities of a living, breathing human – the warmth, pheromones, genitals, and tongues that make physical connections unique.

Furthermore, if you and your partner will be spending the holidays apart in your respective homes, a vibrator could serve as a means to maintain a special connection while you’re physically separated.

How to Gift a Vibrator


Initiate the dialogue beforehand, not afterward

A gifted vibrator should not serve as the catalyst for your very first discussion about sexual aids; it should be the culmination of open, honest conversations you’ve already engaged in. In other words, a vibrator shouldn’t unexpectedly appear in someone’s stocking as a complete surprise.

Instead, drop hints and offer glimpses of your own perspectives to create an environment for discussion and gauge their reactions. If you’re uncertain about how to begin this conversation, introduce the topic within a story or an anecdote. Share something you’ve come across, like an intriguing article or a conversation you’ve overheard regarding vibrators. Find a natural segue into discovering their broader opinions on the subject and, from there, delve into their specific preferences. If you’re discussing this with a partner, addressing it within the context of your intimacy can be a fitting moment, encompassing a broader conversation about what you both desire, both individually and together.

Discussing matters related to sex may initially seem challenging, but the more you engage in it, the more comfortable it becomes. Keeping the tone light-hearted helps alleviate any tension. Take the leap and be open to whatever emerges from these conversations.

Exercise extreme caution when presenting the gift

Although the path to destigmatizing masturbation and sex toys involves open discussion, it’s important to remember that the audience is not necessarily a gathering of casual acquaintances. Whether it’s during a family’s Christmas morning gift exchange or at a restaurant during a holiday date night, the act of gifting a vibrator remains profoundly personal. The safest approach, therefore, is to assume that any vibrator recipient would prefer to receive it privately or to be directed to open it later in a more secluded setting.

The best course of action is to find a tranquil moment, away from the main event, where they can openly explore their gift.

Adding some thoughtful extras like batteries (if the vibrator is battery-operated) and a special pouch or carrying case, which most vibrators already come with, but it’s worth confirming, can enhance the gift-giving experience.

Opt for straightforward and unobtrusive choices


Vibrator preferences vary widely, so it’s wise to choose simplicity unless particular desires have been communicated. Seek out a compact and adaptable option.

From an aesthetic standpoint, a vibrator with a neutral color and a non-phallic design is likely the most versatile choice. For those who seek even greater discretion, there are miniature vibrators that resemble lipstick or elegant jewelry.

…or empower them to choose for themselves!

The person you’re considering buying a vibrator for might already be completely at ease exploring sex toys online or in a physical store. However, they might not have had the opportunity to do so yet or don’t want to spend their own money on it. It’s also possible that they’re well-versed in the world of vibrators and are looking to expand their collection. In such cases, a gift card or certificate is an ideal way to offer them a thoughtful nudge while allowing them the autonomy to select the perfect option.

If you’re thinking of gifting a vibrator to a friend or family member, you could make it more enjoyable by including some recommendations of your personal favorites as a starting point. When gifting a partner, suggest going shopping together for a fun, collaborative decision-making experience.

Trust your instincts

If you find yourself spending considerable time debating whether giving a vibrator as a gift is a good idea, and if you’re uncomfortable broaching the subject in conversation, it’s likely not the right choice.

If you do manage to bring up the topic of sex toys but it’s not met with enthusiasm, take it as a sign that they may not be ready to receive a vibrator as a gift at this moment.

However, if you’re still eager to explore the idea of gifting a vibrator, consider making it a fail-proof gift for yourself instead, every time.